A Beach Wedding
by Wooden Tulips
Summary: Sometimes, watching your best friend get married is harder than you think. Sometimes its downright painful. M for language.


It was supposed to be my wedding. I was the one who knew Jake from childhood. I was the one his mother claimed as the daughter she never had. I was the one who was there for him through every up and down in his life. I was his first kiss, his first date, his first everything. I should be the one standing beside him in the incredibly poofy white dress that looked completely ridiculous on the Hawaiian beach. I should be the one planning a future filled with travel and kids and ordinary adventures.

Instead, I was to the bride's left, holding her bouquet and mine, the heavy gold band that would soon be on Jake's left hand securely on my thumb, my hair whipping in my face as I plastered on a smile, feigning happiness for the bride and groom when really, inside my heart was breaking.

Once the wedding was over and I was allowed to be on my own, I happily set up camp at the bar. I'd made friends with the bartender at the rehearsal dinner the night before in an effort to keep myself well lubricated for today and hopefully get through it without doing anything ridiculous.

I set my second empty glass on the bar top and tapped the counter expectantly.

"You've had two in less than ten minutes. Why don't you wait a bit and see how you feel."

"I'll feel better if you give me another one right now, I can tell you that for damn sure."

He sighed and set a glass of water down in front me. "Drink that, then you can have another."

"What are you, my mother?"

"No, just trying to look out for you. I saw how you were last night."

I scowled at him and drained the glass of water in one fell swoop. "Happy?"

"Yes."

"Fantastic. Give me another drink."

He shook his head but passed me another glass of tonight's poison, tequila. I sipped it this time, winking at Bartender Edward. He grinned and moved on down the bar to tend to other patrons. I turned on my stool and watched the reception taking place behind me. There was dancing and laughter, the evening breeze off the ocean keeping everything pleasant. It was a perfect night, I had to give them that. The stars were glittering over head and the ocean was close enough that we could smell the deliciously briney watery scent of it and hear the distant roar but not so close that the waves crashing overwhelmed us.

I turned around and drained my glass setting it back down and motioning for another. Bartender Edward quirked an eyebrow at me.

"Where the hell are you putting this? Most girls your size would be on the floor already."

"I can hold my alcohol."

"I'm seeing that." He poured me another and refilled the water glass. "One glass of water for every two drinks. Plus you should eat."

I sighed and stood up, walking to a nearby table and grabbing a plate of food off it. The diners were off somewhere, dancing or visiting with other guests. I set the plate on the bar and dug in. Fish. Original.

Bartender Edward studied me for a moment. "So what's the deal?"

"What deal?" I asked around a mouthful of disgustingly perfect fish. I hated them right now. Really hated them. Why couldn't something have been royally awful today?

"With you. You don't seem too happy to be here."

"Yeah, well, I'm not. Do you know who I am?"

"The maid of honor."

"Besides that." I drained the water glass while he handed me another tequila.

"Well, obviously someone important to either the bride or the groom. I'd guess the bride's best friend growing up, maybe her sister or college roommate?"

"Yes. To all of it." He looked confused and I sighed. "I'm the bride's twin sister and the groom's ex-girlfriend."

"Wow."

"Yep. He and I were together from like, high school through college. Five damn years."

"And then he started dating your sister."

"Yep. See why I need lots of booze tonight?"

He shook his head lightly and poured another drink for me, a double this time, and passed it over. "So why are you here?"

I sighed and toyed with the glass. "Because I'm a masochist? I dunno."

He was quiet. "Well, whatever you are, you're a good friend and a great sister."

"Yeah, well, not that great. I didn't get them a gift."

He grinned and patted my hand. "You'll be fine. I'm around if you need anything."

I raised my glass to him before sipping it and turning back around. The happy couple were having their first dance now, swaying together and looking at each other with adoration. It was enough to make you vomit. Especially since their song was "I Will Always Love You." Idiots didn't realize it wasn't a love song, it was about breaking up. Tools.

I waited an appropriate amount of time before finally just leaving. I picked up the long gauzy skirt in one hand and held onto a bottle of champagne I commandeered off a table with the other as I carefully picked my way across the sand and out of the bright lights from the party. I walked a ways, kicking off the ridiculous stilettos and plopping down on the sand, staring out at the black ocean, the sounds of the party a distant murmur that the crashing waves drowned out. I took a sip from the champagne and set it down beside me, creating a little hollow in the sand to hold the bottle upright.

I wasn't sure how long I sat there, listening to the waves and sipping my champagne, generally wallowing in self-pity, before another body joined mine. I looked up, startled, to see Sarah, Jake's mom, settling down on the dune next to me. She didn't say anything, just grabbed the bottle and took a sip before holding it out to me. I sipped as well and set it back in the hole.

"It should have been you."

"I know."

"I like her, you know that, but she's not you. She's too prissy."

I didn't bother to hide my smile. "Believe me, I know."

Sarah sighed and turned to me, her dark eyes sad. "I'm going to be happy for his sake and after tonight, I'll never say a word, but I really wish it was you. You were so good together. You completed each other. Her…I don't know."

I patted her arm. "I think they love each other."

"You would know. You know the two of them better than anyone else."

"Maybe that's the problem. Jake needed someone who didn't know all his dirty secrets. Someone he could make new memories with and have new firsts with."

She sighed again and shook her head. "Well, I guess that's that. They're married and moving off to god knows where, leaving me alone."

"Sarah, you're not alone, you've still got Jared."

She snorted and shook her head. "Might as well be alone."

I hated to do it, but I agreed with her. Jake's older brother was no good. He'd already spent time in juvy and jail, it was only a matter of time before he was back on a more permanent basis.

She pushed herself up off the sand, patting my cheek as she did so. "You're a good kid. You'll find someone great. I'm just sorry it's not Jake."

"Me too."

I watched as she walked back towards the party, dusting the sand off her pale pink skirt. She really was a lovely woman, even at 50.

I sat a while longer before deciding I was done and headed back, my empty champagne bottle in one hand, the shoes in the other. I dropped the shoes by my still vacant bar stool and set the empty bottle down. Bartender Edward looked at me curiously.

"Where'd you go?"

"To the beach. It was lovely."

He chuckled and took the bottle, adding it to the pile of empties behind him. "Want something else to drink?"

"No, water's fine."

"So you feel better then."

"Not even a little bit, but I don't want to have a shitstorm of a hangover tomorrow so I figured I'd start hydrating."

"Good plan."

I nodded. "So what's your story? You don't look Hawaiian."

He laughed and shook his head. "I'm not. I came for a vacation a few years ago and just…stayed."

"Just like that."

"Yep." He grinned at me. "Just like that. I didn't have a job back home yet, nothing real anyway, and I loved it here. It was better than going back to Wisconsin."

"Amen to that," I laughed, holding up my glass in a salute. "So no girl back home waiting for you?"

"Nope. Not then, and definitely not now." He winked at me and I laughed again.

"Are you flirting with me Bartender Edward?"

"Maybe a little."

"You just want a big tip, huh?"

"I wouldn't complain."

I chuckled and sat back, holding my hands out. "Do I look like I have any money on me?"

His eyes swept up and down my form appreciatively. "Nope."

"Sorry bucko, no tip from me."

"Oh well. Maybe I'll just flirt with you for fun then."

"I think I can handle that." I winked back at him and sipped on my water.

The party went late, the happy couple only having eyes for each other for the majority of it. They'd occasionally stop and talk to someone, my sister throwing her head back in laughter like whatever the guest had said was the funniest thing she'd ever heard. Bitch.

Finally, around 2, Bartender Edward was shutting down. I was still on my barstool, staring into the darkness in the direction of the ocean.

"You ok?"

I looked at Edward and smiled. "I'm fine."

"You should go get some sleep. You didn't get much last night, I'm sure."

"No, I didn't."

"So go now. Sleep all day tomorrow."

I shook my head. "I'll probably just go for another walk along the water."

"You shouldn't do that alone. It's dangerous."

I rolled my eyes. "So go with me."

He looked surprised. "Really?"

I shrugged. "Sure, unless you want to go home and sleep."

He chuckled and looked around, clearly contemplating. "Ok, sure, if you don't mind a walk on the beach with a stranger."

"You're not a stranger. You're Bartender Edward from Wisconsin."

He laughed then and nodded. "Ok then."

I started towards the beach again, leaving my shoes behind and holding up my long skirt. He followed along behind me, walking slowly with his hands in his pockets. I walked past where I'd stopped before, far enough that the remaining revelers were soundless dark shapes moving in the brightness down the beach. I settled on the sand and sighed, breathing in the ocean air in great big gulps. I lay back on the sand, rubbing my scalp with my fingertips and pulling out the pins that had been digging into my scalp for close to 18 hours now. I flung them into the darkness happily and sighed.

"So now, my life can begin over again. No more expectations."

"None, huh?"

I turned my head to the side and smiled to see Bartender Edward had taken off his shoes and socks and was wiggling his toes in the white sand.

"Well, of course to marry a fabulously wealthy man and pop out gorgeous genius children, but otherwise, no. Not a one."

He chuckled and leaned back on his hands, crossing his ankles and looking at the water. I propped myself up on my elbows and looked in the same direction.

"You know what I've always wanted to do but never did?"

"There's no telling." He looked over at me with a grin.

"Skinny dip in the ocean." I sat up then, pushing myself to my knees and then to my feet. He watched with amusement while I pulled the sheath dress off and dropped it on the sand. "Come on. Come swimming with me."

"Seriously?"

"Sure, why not. Aren't the bridesmaids supposed to hook up with random strangers at weddings?"

He laughed. "So we're hooking up then?"

"Who knows? Play your cards right and maybe so." I shimmied out of my underwear and unfastened my bra, dropping them both on the sand with my dress and shaking my hair out more, rubbing my scalp and enjoying the warm evening breeze on my skin. I held out my hand and after a moment, a large warm one gripped it. I glanced over and grinned when I saw Edward was naked now too.

"Hey, if you think I'm gonna pass up a chance to swim naked with a hot bridesmaid, you're crazy."

I laughed and started running for the water, pulling him behind me. It was warm when we hit it but I still yelped a little, startled by the wetness of it. I let go of Bartender Edward's hand and dove under the oncoming wave, surfacing on the other side, gasping and shoving my mass of wet sticky hair out of my face.

Bartender Edward was beside me, spluttering some. Apparently he'd been caught unawares by the wave. I laughed and pounded him on the back. He grinned and pushed his hair back.

"Well this is embarrassing."

I chuckled and impulsively wrapped my arms around his neck, letting the next wave lift me up and pressing my lips to his. He automatically wrapped his arms around my waist and held on as another wave crashed into us, pushing us back and under.

A while later, we climbed out of the water, dripping and laughing. Bartender Edward pulled his pants back on and I pulled on his shirt. He was tall enough that I was reasonably covered as we skulked up the beach, skirting the party clean up and heading for his car. Fifteen minutes later we were at his small beach side hut of a house, still laughing as we stumbled into the house, trying not to wake his roommate. He kicked the door to his room shut behind him and we fell onto his bed, a tangle of arms and legs and wet hair.

I woke up the next morning to bright sunlight streaming through an open window. I yawned and stretched, enjoying the feeling of complete and total restedness. I felt good. Better than I thought I would. I rolled out of the bed, wrapping the wrinkled sheet around me and looked around the room. Bartender Edward wasn't doing that well, apparently.

The furniture was all secondhand and well worn, the sheets dirty, the floors littered with dirty dishes and clothes. I looked around, shaking my head but still smiling.

I grabbed my dress off the floor and slipped into it, not bothering with the underwear. I didn't have a purse or any idea where I was, so I tiptoed out of the room, in search of a phone. I found one in the living room along with a pile of mail. I used that to order a cab and then headed outside to wait.

I was really tempted to follow Bartender Edward's example and just stay. It was gorgeous here and it wasn't like they exactly needed me at the bookstore. Only thing that kept me from doing it without a second thought was Mom.

With my sister married now, Mom would be alone. So would Sarah. If I could convince them to move in together, I'd feel less like I was abandoning them.

"Hey, heading out?"

I turned and saw Bartender Edward standing in the doorway, a pair of wrinkled board shorts sitting low on his hips.

"Yeah. Sorry, I would have left a note but didn't see any paper."

He grinned and dug around in his pockets, holding out some money. "Let me pay for your cab. You don't have any money with you."

"I'm fine," I shook my head. "Thanks though."

"You sure? I could drive you back if you want."

"No, I think it's better if I just take a cab. And pay myself."

He nodded and settled onto a lawn chair next to me. "I had fun last night."

I grinned. "Me too. Thanks for helping take my mind off things."

He chuckled. "I figure it was your version of a tip."

I laughed and nodded. "Fuck, if that was how I tipped, I'd always get fabulous service."

He grinned. "No shit."

The cab pulled up then and we stood, walking towards it. He opened the door for me and studied me for a second before leaning forward and kissing my cheek.

"If you're ever back in town, give me a call."

"Will do."

I winked at him and climbed in, clearing my skirt of the doorframe before he shut it, tapping the top and stepping back. I gave the driver the hotel name and sat back, watching as Bartender Edward got smaller and smaller in the side mirror. Maybe someday I'd be back. I'd definitely give him a call if I was. If I could find him.


End file.
